Quotations over despair
by riposte
Summary: Katie have eaten a twins-tampered cherry that'll make her talk in quotes for a whole week. K/P!
1. cherry on top

**QUOTATIONS OVER DESPAIR  
part one: cherry on top.**

Katie frowned and glared at grinning George, and took the chocolate cake with a cherry on top gingerly, "Did you tamper with this?"

George grinned and said, "Nope, we didn't tamper with the cake!!"

"I don't believe you!" Katie said, and held out the chocolate cake at George

"I'll taste it if you don't believe me," and with that, George took a bite out of the cake and chewed arrogantly, "schee?"

Katie frowned and accepted the bitten cake, "I still think it's fishy," and picked up the cherry and ate it.

George grinned even more widely, and nudged Fred, who was watching it all silently.

"Don't accept rides from strange men, and remember that all men are strange," Katie quoted, and then opened her mouth in horror, "Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds---" and stopped short of the quote.

George and Fred gave each other high-fives and grinned at Katie, and George plucked the cake out of Katie's trembling hand,

"As I said before, we didn't tamper with the cake..." George took a bite and gave it to Fred,  
"Nope, we tampered with the cherry instead!" and Fred took a victorious bite.

"I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room!" Katie shrieked and flung the cherry stem at George

"We tampered the cherry with a Quotation spell!" George announced and licked the icing of the cake  
"You can only speak in quotes for a whole week, now, Kates!" Fred grinned and the twins bounded away.

"He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hope for human condition is a fool..." Katie mumbled and went out of the common room.

It was dinner time when Katie have finished mourning over her loss of normal speech, and so she went into the dining hall and sat beside Alicia.

"Kates! The twins told me that you can only talk in quotes now!" Alicia said, as she helped herself with a helping of turkey.  
"Truth is stranger than fiction," Katie muttered and cut her slice of turkey angrily

Alicia patted Katie's shoulder sympathetically and kicked George's shin under the table, "George! How could you!"

George rubbed his sore shin with a hurt look, "If you kick me again, i'm going to give you something with a rhyming spell in it!"

Fred brightened up at the sound of the threaten, and pulled George's sleeve urgently, and they both started discussing about how to make the threaten a reality. Alicia's face whiten and she looked at the smirking Katie frightenedly. and looked back at the whispering twins,

"If you are going to give me something with a rhyming spell in it, or somewhat, i _shall_ complain to Professor Dumbledore!"  
Katie chimed in gravely, "Laws do not persuade, just because they threaten."

**A/N****:** i don't know _why_ i did this anyway. i was bored. and kinda got the idea o_O;;;; scary.... and anyway, tell me if this sucks or not, cos if it does, am gonna take it awaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!! read and review please? thanks!


	2. deadly word: boo

**QUOTATIONS OVER DESPAIR:  
part two: deadly word: boo**

Katie was roughly waken up by a bouncing Alicia, "Oh Katie! It's Oliver time!"

Katie swatted Alicia's shaking hand off her shoulder and mumbled, "I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting,"

Alicia stared at Katie, bit her lip, and sat down beside the snuggling Katie.

**Five minutes later,**

Katie was once again waken up by Alicia, "Does that quote means that you wanna sleep again?"

Katie sat up and glared at Alicia, "In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then He made school boards!"

Alicia pouted, "That sounds like an insult, Kates!" and ran out of the room, sulking.

Katie threw a pillow at the closed door and lay back down again. 'Dratted Alicia, drat drat drat! Can't sleep again! Dratted Forge and Gred! Will give them the telling off of their lives when I get my speech back. Drats rats mice cockroaches bees!!!' thought Katie angrily as she tore her towel from the towel rack and stomped towards the bathroom.

Katie stepped out of the bathroom and went towards her trunk, and rummaged around.

**Three minutes later,**

A big pile was shadowing Katie. A big pile of undies, bras, wifebeaters, boxers, blouses, shirts, tops, pants, shorts, and whatever the hell. Katie frowned and said, "I have a right to my anger, and I don't want anybody telling me that I shouldn't be, that it's not nice to be, and that's something's wrong with me because I get angry!!!"

Suddenly, the piled moved, and Katie screamed and threw a combat boot at it. The pile said, "Ow,".

The pile was also a red-head. The pile's face looked a lot like..... Percy Weasley.

Katie stared at amazement at the pile with head and hair,

"It's ---" Katie stopped as she realized that she was very cold. _Very very_ cold. _Unnaturally _cold. _Nakedly_ cold.

And she looked down.

And screamed.

And threw another combat boot at the blushing Percy, thus making him unconscious.

And grabbed her towel to cover up her unclothed body.

And rushed out of the Girl's dormitory, screaming, "I've seen the truth, and it's perverted!"

And all of the sleeping Gryffindors woke up and went downstairs to marvel at the sight of a toweled, screaming, quoting girl.

Katie sat down in front of Professor McGonagall, blushing.

"Why did you throw a boot at Mr. Weasley, Miss Bell?" Professor McGonagall stared at Katie, not at all amused.

"Naked truth?" Grinned Katie nervously

"You mean you were naked when Mr. Weasley came in?"

Katie nodded, blushing even more, and making her face look like a blood red lunar eclipse. Except her face's not that kinda round.

"Was he aware of that when he entered your room?"

Katie shrugged and looked at a point a few feet above the staring Professor McGonagall's face.

Professor McGonagall sighed, "All right then, Miss Bell. Call the Weasley twins, I need to talk to them about your... incapability of normal speech."

Katie nodded and went out.

Katie entered the Gryffindor Common Room and was immediately crushed between the Weasley Twins.

"All right, Kates!" said a Twin  
"We've always wanted to knock Percy out!" said the other Twin  
"You fulfilled that dream for us!"  
"You're our hero!!!!!!"

Katie squirmed out of the Twins' hug and glared at them, "Call the Weasley Twins, I need to talk to them about... your incapability of normal speech!"

A Twin looked at the other Twin, "Who's she's quoting, eh, George?"  
The identified George looked mystified and then shrugged, "Oi Kates! Is it a Professor?"

Katie nodded and pointed at her Gryffindor badge on her cloak.

"Oh, Professor McGonagall!" Fred nodded, and the twins bounded away [I have this liking towards bounding twins....]

Katie went up to the hospital to apologize, but was blocked by Madame Pomfrey,

"Mr. Weasley is still sleeping, Miss Bell!" Madame Pomfrey frowned at Katie, as though disapproving her knocking Percy out [duh!]

"Whoever does not love his work cannot hope that it will please others!" Katie said angrily

"I am _very_ dedicated to my work, Miss Bell. And I do love it so. " Madame Pomfrey frowned even more at the stony-faced Katie, "Fine then."

Katie grinned at the frowning nurse and rushed in. She saw that Percy was sleeping on the bed at the end of the room, Katie bit her lip, dragged a chair there and sat down beside the Percy. She leaned back and thought about the proper ways of asking forgiveness.

It was the next day, and Percy was still in lands sickeningly full of rabbits, lollies and rainbows. Katie went to visit Percy after every lesson, and stay there till the ten minutes before the next lesson. And now, school's finished, and Katie will be there till dinnertime.

Katie noticed a slight bump on Percy's forehead, and since she was quite horrified at what her combat boots had done, she went to Madame Pomfrey and asked for a medicine to make the swelling go down. Though, since it'll take up some time to make Madame Pomfrey understand what she wants, Katie wrote down her message on a piece of paper and gave it to Madame Pomfrey with a hopeful smile. Madame Pomfrey, happy at anybody who likes to help people heal, gave Katie a bottle of 'De-Swell!' and a piece of flannel. After given the said items, Katie went beside Percy quickly, and pour a few drops of 'De-Swell!' onto the flannel and dabbed Percy's bump.

'**BOO!!**' screamed sometwo, and Katie jumped, tipping the 'De-Swell!' bottle, and turned around.

Madame Pomfrey rushed out quickly and saw the twins laughing madly, messing up a once neat bed, and Katie, _maroon_ with anger. She stopped to watch what Katie would do, predicting it would be quite interesting.

George stopped laughing, sat on the bed and grinned cheekily at Katie, "Kates, you're maroonish! You look drunk!"

Katie's eyes flashed and she lifted up her chin haughtily, "Yes Madame, I am drunk but you are ugly and tomorrow I'll be sobre!"

Fred, still in hysterics over his partaking in an immature act, laughed, "Sobre! SOOO-OOOO-BREEEEE!"

"It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations!"

Fred stopped laughing and scowled at Katie, "We're only joking! You needn't say that we're uneducated!"

Katie ground her teeth, pointed at Percy and made the sleeping hand sign. Fred and George sniggered, thus making Katie even more mad.

Katie clenched her fists, and closed her eyes dramatically, "Stupidity is the devil. Look in the eye of a chicken, and you will know. It's the most horrifying, cannibalistic and nightmarish creature in this world," And with that, she turned around, to tend Percy. But instead, she screamed.

"I'm afraid I cannot cure her, Minerva" Albus Dumbledore said solemnly, and stroked his white beard

"Why not, Albus?! It's only a simple Quotation spell, isn't it?" cried Minerva McGonagall, quite worried at this

"I'm afraid the twins have concocted a new _ stronger_ Quotation spell, which I, nor Snape can make out. Now, if you would please be complaisant, I would like to speak to the twins, about their spell of course."

Minerva McGonagall nodded, and walked briskly out of the Headmaster's office.

Madame Pomfrey quickly rushed out of her hiding place and rushed beside Katie, and screamed.

Minerva McGonagall could faintly hear the sounds of screaming, and now, it's even louder, like a male had decided to join in. No, like _two_ males. And she recognized that the males' voices were the twins. And she knew it took a _lot_ to make the twins scream. So she dashed towards the Hospital.

Rumours were passed around during dinner. Katie Bells, George and Fred Weasley and Professor McGonagall were missing. And that was very unusual, due to the twins' large appetite and Professor McGonagall's obsession over her normal routine activites. And most of the rumours were fake and absurd, but only a few have a slight percentage of truth in it.

Lavender whispered to Parvati excitedly, "Did you hear?! Katie and the Weasley Twins were flogged by Professor McGonagall!"

That was of course, untrue.

Hermione and Harry watched a sickly-looking Ron, Ron then looked up at the expectant faces of his two best friends and spat out his food,

"Whot?!"

Hermione looked disgusted at the chewed-up food remains, "What happened to Percy, Ron?"

Harry chimed in, "Yeah, I saw Professor McGonagall dashing, her robes billowing, it's a strange sight, Ron. I almost thought my scar was playing up on me."

Ron looked interested, "You see strange things like that when your scar's acting up?"

Hermione's face looked dour as she tried to interrupt the gabbling boys.

There weren't any rumours there, moving on...

Draco took a gulp of his pumpkin juice and smiled smugly at the sickening Pansy, "I heard that Prefect Weasley looks uglier than Potty! That knock from the boot must've made some dent on his weak head!"

Now, _that_ is a bit true.

But of course, it's not quite hard to be uglier than Harry, though I fancy Percy better.

Well, it still has some slight percentage of truth in it.

**A/N:** weee! chappie two! nyarm! 

**artemis **heh, I choosed the word **riposte** because of the other meaning, which is: retort. well, mainly because of that. the other reason is also because i like the other meaning, which is the opposite of parry! 

Thanks for making me one of the exclusive people in your favourites list. =]

**Queen Susan** Do you mind if I call you Queen Susan only? =] @ you if you don't. And I don't mind if you sic the twins on me. It'll be fun! [grins]

**Snowdrop** well, I fulfilled your... want. one of your wantings anyway. happy? =]

agh! @ the test tomorrow. and anyway, I think I'll update on Friday... love the weekends.


End file.
